WATER

I recently attended a summer school and attended a lecture about water problems in Kenya. I am sorry to say it was a tad boring and I found myself trying to stay awake and stay interested . So I began making notes that could be turned into something creative. This is what I was left with. Not sure if it is a poem or anything really - probably just a outpouring of a mind trying to stay focused.

WATER

Queue water,
Introduction water,
Community water.
Water from the tap,
Tap water,
Water from the shower,
Water for the shower,

Culture of water,
Time spent; time spent for water,
Time for water,
Tribes for water; water tribes,
Water transfer,
Water treatment,
Water pipe; piped water,
Water connection,
Transmit water; water transmission,
Water security,
Kenya water; Kenyan water,
Water pollution; polluted water,
Consumable water,
Water conflicts, conflicts of water,
Fetching water,
Irrigation, irrigate,
Well; water wells,
Rationed water; water ration,
Water charge, pay for water,
Water payments,
Water solutions; solutions to water,
Nomad water; travelling like water,
Following the rain,
Following the wetness;
Travelling water,
Certified water; water certificate,
Private water,
Managed water,
Government water,
Local water,
Provided water; water providers,
Conflict water, water conflict;
Water permits; permitted water,
Community water projects,
Failed water projects,
Failed water,
Benefits of water,
Water donors,
Waters fails,
Donors fail,
Oil like water,
Oil and water resource,
Water resource,
Female water,
Water for the girls,
Water by the girls,
Carried, collected, kept,
Harvested, owned?
Water for women,
Women’s water.
Dammed water; water dammed,
Dammed by the water,
Dam the water,
Dam water,
Coloured water,
Blue, green, black, brown,
Muddy, clear, murky, slimy,
Cold, hot, cool, warm,
Wet,
Wet water,
Dry water,
Live water,
Dead water,
Drowned.
Thirst quenching water,
Water for life,
Alive water,
Awake water,
Help water,
Rehydrating water,
WATER.
Laughing water; crying water,
Helping water; fun water,
Water, water, water
WATER.
Water to live; water for life,
WATER
Vegetable water; soup water,
Hot water,
Tea, coffee, and water,
Water economy,
Economy of water,
Money water
WATER.

Dix

BR - Farewell, My Lovely by Raymond Chandler

I have always wanted to read a Raymond Chandler book but for some reason, really unknown to me, I didn't want to buy a new copy. So I have trawled the second hand shops looking for a copy of anything really.

At uni we did read some extracts and a short story and this is what got me interested and lodged the idea in the back of my head.

It is not that this is a brilliant book, in fact there were times when I struggled to keep up with the story (this may have been because I mainly read it when I was tired and just about to drop off to sleep - a couple of times I fell asleep with it glued to me face!) but there is definitely something about the way he writes that is well just amazing. It is hard to think that this was written so long ago - published 1969 - and although it did seem old in some ways, obviously short of technology and such like but even so certain paragraphs, certain sentences, places where he has put words together in such a way as to take my breathe away. Sometimes he just writes so well, so beautifully that nothing else matters.

I am glad I have read a Raymond Chandler at last. I will surely read another some day. I particularly want to read The Big Sleep and or any short stories if they exist. Sometimes it is just so awe inspiring to read words so beautifully written, they catch at me with almost lust and desire. Such beauty that I feel that I can never hope to reach. But it is good to try.

If you have never read one, read a Raymond Chandler - put it on your bucket list as a to do.

Dix

Squeak and Bubble

&

Bob said "I want bubble and squeak for tea today."

"But we only have bubble and squeak on Boxing Day?"

Bob though for a while.

"Fuck it, fire up the frying pan woman. It's bubble and squeak for tea."


Dix

Another fab pressie

My mate Lenny also sent me this painting - isn't it cool. I am pretty sure it is based on a trip we all took to London when we visited the Tate Modern. This was a scene from the underground when I had had a couple too many of this wonderful raspberry cocktail and was just a little well, tipsy. I am hoping Lenny will explain this painting more - I think I am the blonde with the big red mouth (I wonder why) but will let you know more, I hope.

Both the works are being framed up and put up in the lounge. I love original work - always have and I love it when people make things for me. I have some great notebook covers that JC has made and carry one with me all the time - I always cherish things like this, totally original and irreplaceable.

Love to my great mates and hope to see you soon.

dix

Jangling Edge

I feel on edge.
My nerves are jangling.
Please.

I feel like shouting,
shouting to release.
Please -

I need to calm
down my jangling nerves.
Please ...

I fell the urge,
the urge to be alone
Please let me be.

Please leave me
Please leave me alone.
Please give me time to be alone
Please give me time to chill
and find me!

by Dix

Postcard Exercises

Dear Jean

The weather is glorious; company is fine! Can't believe I haven't done this before. You were right, as always. Just what I needed. I will be home later than planned though. Your William Billy xxxx

Snooze

The phone buzzes and trembles; Paul Simon calls me Al. I stretch and grapple to find the silence button. I am momentarily awake. I curl back into my warm space. 5 minutes to be in any world. Flying around blue skies, swooping and watching, or swimming across green oceans and floating forever. Or maybe just doing and being whatever, whoever I want.

Dix

This is an exercise I did recently on writing a piece of postcard fiction. Two ideas that I hope give an idea of a story.

Dix

Silence

He wished he hadn’t spoken those last words.

He wished he could take them back. In his head they were reversing back into his mouth like an old 45 record being pushed backward against the needle.

But he couldn’t.

Her face creased, momentarily. Her eyes were full of hurt and pain. She was staring at him then looked down, her head and shoulders beaten and drooping.

The room went really really quiet, not that comfortable silence of two people secure in each others presence but a ‘cut the air’ almost menacing feel that left him wanting to escape.

They both just stood, still. Neither appearing to know what to say next. He shuffled his feet, noticing the grey green scuff on his white trainers and mentally noting to clean them soon.

Still nothing was said.

He looked over at her feet; they were naked, clean and beautiful, beautiful in a way that only female feet can be. Each toe nail glazed with a pearlescent pink varnish, immaculately done, no chips or messy edges.

Her feet were still, unmoving as she was, head down, body slightly stiff but controlled.

He just wanted her to speak. If she got angry that would be his punishment. She should scream at him, unfurling the hurt into him. He would accept it happily; he would welcome her anger. He would look up and listen, blinking in all the right places, accepting of whatever hurts she would stab at him – just to make it ok. She could list his numerous faults, his physical abnormalities, his weaknesses his tactlessness. He knew them all so well.

She just had to break the silence, to make it be alright.

Maybe he should list them himself; maybe he could throw himself at her mercy, beg and plead for her anger. Maybe he could say he didn’t mean it. That he was sorry.

He just needs her to break the silence.

Dix

This is the result of a writing exercise I did today. I really enjoyed it and felt I had created something I liked and has potential. The exercise started with He wished he .... and we wrote for approx 15 mins.

BR - One Day by David Nichols

I have looked at this book many times over the last couple of years and thought it would be something I would like but not got it. Then I saw it recommended on My Life in Books (can't remember who by but loved the sound of it) so was in a proper bookshop so got it.

It is wonderful - one of those books that you can't put down, one of those books that has moved me in so many ways - at times I felt depressed by the female character because I could understand her life and the male character reminds me of someone I once knew well.

I loved the dialogue between them, their thoughts and feelings hit home so much. The words carried me along with them.

This is a wonderful book, modern, alive and just well, wonderful. I kept reading and reading desperate to get to the end but never wanting it to stop. These were real people to me, real people in my life who I was watching live their lives, making mistakes and doing the right thing, having a great and awful time.

And then, as per normal the problem arose. The ending. I often have a problem with endings and I knew 100 - 150 pages towards the end that things weren't going the way I hope, expected or wanted. Then it happened, someone died and I didn't want that. I didn't want it to end this way. This isn't how life should be (and these people were alive to me).

Where is the happy ending that I so long for; or even the satisfactory ending.

Now I have a dilemma - I loved the book, it is definitely a keeper but it is the whole 'killing off Dobby' thing all over again - as a wanna be writer this ending doesn't feel right - it isn't what I wanted but is it what I would have done. I finished the book Tuesday and have had a day to think about it - how else could it have ended - happy ever after - them getting everything they wanted - dull but satisfying. Not happy ever after because certain wishes aren't fulfilled. Yeah that would have been OK. Not being together - making new lives apart remembering the good time - this might have been what I would have done. But death, hmm not at all sure.

I know I will read this book again someday - I will see different aspects of the characters, perhaps it won't be so relevant to where I am today - who knows. Will I feel different about the ending - not sure - maybe, maybe I do a little already.

What has it really made me think; wish I could write like this; wish I could make a reader connect the way I feel I have. Maybe then I will understand about endings, how difficult it is to satisfy the reader at the end - who knows.

Whatever though - read this book, enjoy it; hate it; love it but read it. I really really recommend it.

Dix

Off to the Dump

My task for today is to take stuff to the dump. Not very exciting I know but quite cathartic as it means more stuff is got rid of. I am probably making a mistake going on a Monday as I suspect lots of people will be queued up to dump their stuff after the weekend.

I have stuff that has been sitting outside waiting to be disposed of for a couple of months so getting rid of it will be a positive thing. Trouble is I think I feel like my life is a bit in the 'dump' right now. I can't get a job that I really want and just get rejected, rejected, rejected. I don't seem to be getting any where with my writing. Sometimes I sit down or just before I go to sleep and I have the most wonderful words inside my head but every time I try to write them down they just seem like crap - crap to be dumped.

I know I am feeling like this because I am struggling to get a job I want, something that has not really happened to me before, because I am being so lethargic about my creativity, because my mind is still full of worries about money and bills and how to find the money to get the car serviced and on and on and on. But somehow I have to snap myself out of this rubbish and get back to the positive.

I am 50 soon, something I am looking forward to, I have a job that is OK, the people I work for (with) are great just the cuts making it seems so depressing. I get pleasure from my work some days - more than some people can say.

So what have I got to do now; eat less, overeating is making me feel like crap, move more - I love my daily walk with the dog (about 1 1/2 walking) but maybe I need to exert myself more, write something, doesn't matter what but do it, sleep less and do more, be happy with my lot and optimistic about finding solutions to my problems.

Easy yeah?

Dix

Passionate TV

Firstly, excuse the photo of Anne Robinson - I am not a fan of her style and never will be - but I am a huge fan of this program My Life in Books. It is a half hour program shown on BBC2 at 6.30pm where famous people (I am careful here not to use the word celebrity because I feel they are not celebrities but people who have become famous for lots of reasons, not just TV but politics and writers etc. They come on the show and chose books that they love and talk about them; introduce them to the audience and in away introduce themselves to the audience.

There has been a wide variety of people on the show who have all been interesting and have all had something to say. I would be a liar if I said I wanted to read all the books that they recommended but certainly there are many that I would like to read; many that I have already read and many that I wish I could read (different from wanting to read because some of them seem like books I would struggle to get through but wish I had the stamina).

I have found the writers particularly passionate (well I would, wouldn't I) - they talk about books in language that I use, with the passion that I feel. They hold and smell and caress books in the way that I do, and remember the characters and plot like they are old friends. They talk about the memories evoked by reading this book and how they changed their lives or how their lives where changing when they read it. They talk about memories of family, of lovers, of children, even of world events and politics. They talk about love.

I record this program and watch it at least twice - just to feel the joy of the reader - the joy of their language - their joy for books. I feel that this is my program, this is something that I can totally connect to and love (not so much on the TV for me like this anymore).

I hope the BBC keep this program (maybe once a week). Its OK if it is on at a later, even obscure time, those of us who love it will find away.

The program is part of World Book Year (Week?) and has made me think about which books I would talk about on the program - so here is my list of My Life in Books (in no particular order).

The Colour Purple by Alice Walker - I studied this book and though to some it may be obvious this is the first time anyone told me that Jesus may not have been white, he was not the white man with beard and long hair that I had seen on the cross all my childhood. It made me think about what faith was really about - how we all fit in the world of God. It made me think about status and position and pain and suffering and survival and love. It made me think and for that I will always be truly thankful.

The Sea by John Banville - I love this book because of the way it is written, the pure beauty of the writing - I read it with just pure jealously and wishing I could write words this beautifully. I have to say I never really loved the main character, not sure he is really that nice a person, not sure I totally thought the plot and storyline were brilliant but all that is forgiven for such beautiful words. Just to read with pure envy and admiration is an amazing experience.

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert M. Pirsig - I read this book when I was a teenager and loved it, I guess maybe I wasn't totally sure what it was saying, that I didn't have the knowledge or experience to truly understand his words, but I read it again whilst I was at Uni and really understood why it had impacted on my so much. A basic story weaved around a philosophy for life, a philosophy of loss and love. I tried to explain this book to my college classmates and failed dismally - something I will always regret.

Rebecca by Daphine Du Maurier - I am not really a huge classics fan, really not into the angst and annoying women of many of the Austen, Bronte clans but I love the second Mrs De Winter. (Think that is right???). I love her outsideness, how she lives in the world she feels she doesn't understand and doesn't fit with. Her gentle soul that is so easily hurt and bruised but yet in the end is strong. The wonderful picture of the awful first wife, written so well she appears in the readers mind like some awful beautiful witch, the weak husband, the wonderful scenery and house. I revisit this book often to remind myself of its beauty.

The Essential Spike Milligan - I love Spike Milligan, I particularly love his poetry. I wish I had got to know his work when he was alive, had been able to watch him on TV and explore his older work. I didn't. I read his poetry as much as possible, I buy anything of his I see second hand and am trying to get a full catalogue of his work (particularly his poetry). It makes me laugh, it makes me cry, it makes me think about so much. To me he was so underrated, possibly so misunderstood by his peers and certainly be later generations. I think readers will return to his work in the future and see something new, something wonderful. That it what I see.

Amy Johnson Queen of the Air by Midge Gillies - this is a very personal book and one which I will never forget. Amy Johnson flew with my grand father - we have family photographs of them together and family stories of their relationship! I never really knew who she was, and still might not (this is a biography) but read this book to see if I could understand how my grandfather got to fly planes, what got him there. It was so interesting and I searched the pages for what might have been a clue to him, a mention of him, a feel of him. (There is a piece that might be about him but I can't tell and the author was unable to identify this man either - that I believe is a story for the future). This book is well written and interesting and helped me try to understand a man I never knew, who died in his plane crash in 1936 but has always seemed so exciting to me.

At the end of the show they are asked which book is their guilty pleasure, which of these would they take on holiday if they could only take one. Of course I would take them all but I suspect my guilty please is the Spike Milligan because he can evoke some many emotions and I can see something different each time I read them.

There are many more books I could list here (the obvious omission being Harry Potter) but these are the ones I have chosen here and now.

I would love to know what your life in books is, what is your little list of books and why? Care to share?

Dix

Broken New Years Resolutions

I

I always make New Years Resolutions (NYR's) - normally the same old stuff, do more; lose weight; be more; write more; write everyday; get a better job etc, etc, etc.

This year I didn't do all those things - well I did in my mind but mainly I concentrated on two NYR's - one was to be more positive, more optimistic about life. I have tried really hard to do this and apart from when I have been feeling crappy and ill, have tried to keep to it. I feel better for although I still have to regularly remind myself, I like it, I life living life to the positive - it helps - it make life better, it makes life easier.

The other NYR's was to stop buying books. This was really about saving money. As anyone will know who regularly reads my blog, money is tight and in the main I have stop being a consumer - I have had to. But somehow I have kept buying books, normally cheaply new or second hand but was still regularly buying books. In fact I have a massive pile to read and keep thinking one day I will have the time and the energy to just sit and plough through them.

I have failed miserably. It is not yet the end of February and I bet I have purchased the best part of twenty books - some second hand (I am still indulging my passion for second hand poetry books), some cheaply new (the pound shop has some pretty amazing hard backs and I picked one up the other day that was actually signed by the author), some in the Supermarket where £4 can buy a good current novel and today I went to Waterstones and 'bloo' £25 quid on new full price and reduced books.

And you know what I don't feel guilty, I really don't. I love books, I love reading them, I love owning them, I love looking at them and touching them, I love talking about them - I LOVE BOOKS.

So I will continue to buy books (luckily my local town does not have a decent book shop so the opportunity for new books is not so often), I will continue to trade and sell my read books, I will continue to love them. I will continue to find new books, to find other people with the same passion to talk about them. I will continue to buy books.

For what is life without a good book?

Dix

More Haiku

The first one is a re write (well I added a little cos I got my syllables wrong) - Thanks JC although I suspect there will be more.


Ice cream

Great glorious
mouthfuls of creamy luscious
Cold. Lick, lick, lick. Hmmm.....


Chocolate

Sensual oblong
cool, unsatisfying
object of desire.


Deprivation

It's so weird -
visualising bed; craving
sleep and dreams.



Bob's Philosophy

Bob said "Born to
be slapped and scream; die
screaming silently."



I don't know - are they better - maybe better meanings. Hope you enjoy and JC I don't mind if you check syllables and let me know.

dix

Attempts at Haiku

Writing Haiku for me, is really just about trying to be creative - trying to get something happening with my writing, however small - much like blogging really - I am writing of a sorts and something may just come out of it.

I brought my friend JC a present for Christmas called Haikubes, little cubes of words and themes to inspire Haiku. My daughter brought me the same set so that we could play together over the long distance that divides us at the moment.

This week I sent her 20 random words chosen taken from the shaken up cubes and we both produced some work. But for me, not without issues. I thought it would be fairly easy to follow the 5,7,5 rule but sometimes syllables are quite hard to work out even though I repeat the words over and over and still couldn't be sure that I had got it right. I really enjoyed the process and am really glad to be creating something however poor.

At the moment I am trying to persuade JC to post hers as well, not only on her blog but on our creative blog Cherry Picker as well. We'll see but I will keep on trying. Anyway here is my attempts.

Smelly Dog

The anal glands
on my dog’s bottom squeezed
of smelly pus. Ouch!

Sleep Wars

Hmmm .., alternative
places swim right by me:

as sleep evades.

Giant Visions

Lots of glorious
glancing giants just because
I consume blue gin.

Ice cream

Great glorious
mouthfuls of creamy
Cold. Lick, lick, lick. Hmmm.....

I have changed the punctuation a bit, not sure it if is right but worth messing about with. I have enjoyed the process and will try more.

Might see if I can make my Bob words in Haiku - that could be interesting.

Dix

An end of an era

My friend JC has gone. Moved on to her new life (training to be a secondary school teacher) and I am really pleased and excited for her. I know she has been stuck in a rut and finding it difficult to be optimistic about the future and that this is definately the right thing for her. Good Luck JC.

Trouble is I feel like I am left behind. Some of it is because of the life decisions I have made eg taking on boy and taking time out of work to help him settle in and adjust. (I don't regret this decision as he has needed that time and we have needed the space). But some of the things have happened to me eg my husbands financial mess, his health issues and general massive problems around money. Not being able to find a job as good as the one I had and not being able to fulfil any of my creative potential either through getting a job or managing to do more at home.

But just as I am sad and a little afraid with her moving on and not having anyone to attend 'creative events' with anymore I also realise that I have to take control for myself. I have to start writing everyday and make sure I make time for this, make sure I am brave enough to attend events on my own (although this will be hard with no one to bounce ideas off) and just make sure I get back into thinking creatively and being nicer to myself in lots of ways. This is in my hands - not anyone elses.

Boy goes back to school on Monday (a new school and we will all be a little afraid and need some support to get over this last hurdle) and hopefully 'him' will be signed off by hospital and be able to drive by Wednesday and then be able to really actively look for a job. But even if he can't find a job immediately (I have to believe he will find a job eventually or how can we keep going) that I will make time for myself, make time to read and to write and be myself. No excuses - I have to.

I am starting 2 courses in the next couple of weeks - a fostering one and a diet and health one. Both of these I hope will help restart my brain but also help me gain confidence in myself and what I have and am achieving. Only I can make this happen - only I can see the 'glass half full' again.

Wish me luck.

Another sleepless night

I couldn't sleep again last night just hours and hours of restlessness surrounded by short hours of well, napping. By 5 am I got to that time when I am never sure whether to get up and just do something else or try and get some more sleep. I stayed in bed and haven't woken up until nearly 9 o'clock. I feel like I am wasting the days (although the weather is absolutely hideous so not sure what I can actually do with the day). Now I feel wasted, and low. I have that feeling that is imbedded inside of lowness - it will mean I am liable to cry at any moment and probably will.

I have decided to be a busy as possible today and then hopefully will sleep really well tonight. I have to as Friday night I work all night and have to stay awake.

Maybe it is having to stay awake one night a week that is doing this to me - I am not sure. Only one more month of one night a week then back to normal.

Lots of things going around in my head - and none of them constructive or creative.

But have started another book from my collection that feels like it is going to be a good read. That would mean the last 4 books I have read have been good (5 if you include my toilet book - Harold Pinter).

News, news, news

Firstly I didn't get any of the jobs I applied for (see previous post) and although I was initially upset that I didn't even get an interview I then though hey, maybe somebody is trying to tell me something. At the moment I am going to enjoy the summer holidays with 'boy', do a few hours at work (nights but only one so that should be ok) and write. If I see a job I really want then I will go for it if not I will at this time wait for inspiration. Maybe something will come up. I know that I should probably be more proactive and I understand that our financial situation means I should be looking for a good job but hey it will surely come with time.

Secondly me and JC and Luna and one other lady called N are going to get our work published. And I am now starting to feel really excited. It feels like it is really going to happen. I have to get my work together to fill 20 pages (approx a5) but feel that this will be great something to show people, something concrete to hold and keep me motivated. It is so inspirational to be with the others and putting our work together - to have positive motivating inclusive criticism (if you know what I mean) and to work with people who see me as a creative person first and all the rest of it second. We met up and talked writing and politics and religion and it was fantastic. The work showcased was amazing (JC's long poem is unbelievably good and so inspired) although I am a little jealous that she can create something like this is one go - even if I could it would take me weeks to create a piece of work like that.

So watch this space for news on our soon to be self published book - Cherry Picker.

Mog

Last night

Last night me and JC went to a Uni do. She really didn't want to go and I kinda made her - which gave me a huge responsibility. Then all day I was thinking of ways of not going and in the end I just thought why I am so worried - just go say goodbye to the course leader and come away. So we went - with huge trepidation.

Anyway when I got there I felt ok. There wasn't anyone else from my year and it was a nice relaxed atmosphere. I spoke to my Visual lecturer, (and I think JC is actually right in what she said about him but that's another story), I spoke to the Course Leader and got to say thank you - and got to say that it really did matter and it really had made a major difference to my life and thank you, thank you, thank you. I spoke about football to the poetry guy and it was a nice night.

So we decided to go - our time was over - I even spoke to 'folder holder' but just hello but JC didn't (but that's another post).

Then as we were leaving two students turned up who we worked with and really liked, especially N and it was just like being back in the old days. So much creativity just oozing out of us - ideas and challenges and a definite push to get the Cherry Picker published (how great would that be). We sat for absolutely ages just talking ideas and JC looked so alive and so happy and it was just well, FAB. I got ideas for stories and was able to make promises to take work with me for a meeting next month to talk about our work and start putting it together for CP.

I am so glad I went. I am so glad it was so positive and brilliant. I have a positive closure and a way forward.

Just thankful I was brave enough.

Yesterday

Yesterday felt like it was going to be one of those days. I went for a walk on the beach which I enjoyed and met a new lady and her dog. Then I went to work (abit late as per usual). But on the way to work something happened. Entirely my fault but it just made me think again that only bad things seem to happen when we are down. When I think I have at last hit rock bottom - I haven't. And then all the old thoughts sat with me all day. Another bill to arrive - more trouble - the effect all this will have in the future. When life was good and money was ok these things didn't happen - life just rumbled along with the odd little hump and dip but now it is all mountain and valleys both of which seem to hard to climb or walk. And then I thought about where is my life going, my best mates from Uni are finding there futures (and so they should and I am really happy for them - they are young and have there whole life ahead of them whereas I am nearly 50 and still trying to find away), whereas I am returning to old jobs, old ways which I know are not fulfilling me in anyway. I search the job sites, I search the Internet for just a hint of inspiration but nothing just admin, admin, admin and a wealth of care jobs that I could apply for but they pay shit and I know I will struggle within them to feel fulfilled and happy. So I finished my first job and made my way home. I made my way home wondering how much more downward can I realistically take before it all seems like too much trouble.

And then nearing home I just looked up and noticed the sky was really blue. That beautiful blue of a happy summers day. And straight across the horizon sat this little pile of puffy white clouds, like little cotton wall balls all sat on a wall - very straight and very soft. And this made me smile and think of soft white towels after a bath; of clean sheets on the bed; of freshly iron t-shirts cuddly on the skin; of babies on sheepskin; of cuddly toys given in love; of hope; of love.

And as quick as that life didn't seem so bad. But why, all of the above first paragraph was true - my life still sucks at the moment; I am fearful; I am afraid of the future so how can a row of clouds change all that. I don't know how but I am thankful that I am at that stage where it can. Where a row of clouds can make me feel good; where a row of clouds can me me think creatively; where a row of clouds can give me hope. I am so thankful because when I am ill nothing can do this - nothing can intrude on my misery and give me hope.

In the evening I went to my other job - still feeling tired but feeling glad; glad my mate was working; glad I could laugh with her and the tenants, just glad I had some options. Yesterday I had the options to apply for two jobs and didn't know if I wanted either but at least I had the option and then I got a call to see about some other possible work so hey - maybe the clouds really worked.

Dix

Two Women

I have been sorted through some old notebooks (I have loads of them, probably over a hundred and most have only a couple of pages written on) and found some old bits of poetry. Is it a writers thing to have lots of notebooks? My daughter came home the other day with a really cool Pukka pad which she got sooooo cheap at Uni and I just have to have at least one, probably two. Anyway I found lots of bits of writing, starts of poems and ideas. This was one, don't think it is finished but thought it was interesting...

Two Women

Two Women spending a day up in town,
By the time they leave it's teeming it down.

A strange little man all dressed in red
Ran up to the women and said
'Can you help me,help me please
I seem to have loosened my head.'

He grabbed at his head and began spinning around
before creating a puddle right into the ground.

Women one really didn't give a care,
Women two just pulled at her hair.

Two Women left to catch the train,
and get out of the incessant rain.

M☻g


Must admit I am not sure myself but like the nonsense of it (if you know what I mean). Any ideas?

Boy Racer (2nd Ed)

Marky drives his blood red
street racer down
Consequence Avenue.

His boom base boot
beats loudly as
the body shell vibrates
in bang bang tones.

He races up to
a huddled group of
shopping bag ladies who
tut tut tut
with shaking heads in
nod nod nodding
time to the beat.

M☻g


I've had a re-write on this - just to try and give it more rhythm (or something). Don't know, think it works better. What do you think?